Forgiving What You Can’t Forget

By Lysa Terkeurst

How often do you refuse to forgive someone? Do you fuel yourself with words such as, “I’m the one who was hurt?” “Why should I forgive when I’m the victim?” In the final analysis failing to forgive others, in spite of their cruelty toward you, is a severe detriment…for YOU!

In the book, Forgiving What You Can’t Forget by Lysa Terkeurst, she provides various reasons for the reader to develop a continuous spirit of forgiveness. Her statements are based on scriptural evidence of what Jesus taught and His living example, as well as dealing with her own pain. She freely shares her personal experiences: marriage betrayal, health problems, children who were affected, financial challenges, and problems with friendships.

However, to move toward forgiveness, she acknowledges her pain…all of it; the past hurts that were buried and the current. Then she delves into God’s Word and recognizes forgiveness is freedom, it is necessary for healing, and it is a daily process with many facets. As she states early in the book, “ It takes understanding, insight, divine intervention, and openness.” Then she begins her personal journey to forgiveness, always acknowledging it is a complicated struggle with setbacks.

She invites every reader into the room; if you participate, you will have a handbook of your experiences, scriptures, and your genuine feelings to assist with learning to forgive what you can’t forget. Not an easy task, but an essential one.

She is not condescending. But instead encourages us to be honest and to forgive ourselves, so we can move from pain to forgiveness. Terkeurst is transparent, and never gives the reader the impression she is perfect. Nor does she diminish the difficulty that is a part of forgiveness. And most importantly she reminds us the struggle is not against flesh and blood, but the adversary. So to win the fight against forgiveness, we must engage Christ in our battle.

Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, details various reasons why we try not to forgive, the author’s personal experiences with pain, the scriptures that command us to do so, practical application of the biblical principles, and the outcome of doing what God requires.

In her summary chapter titled “The Beauty of Forgiving,” she writes, “Throw your arms up in victory and declare, ”I’m FREE TO FORGIVE so that I can live!”

That says it all!